Week 1
1 week of waiting. 1 week of not sleeping through the night. 1 week of constantly checking the phone, checking our email.
Today, we got the email we've been waiting for! There is a little girl, they're currently getting more information, and they know she's out of our age range - she's 10 - but are we interested on submitting our profile?
I'm going to pause here and explain the process a little for anyone new, because this is something I get asked a lot. Yes, you can set parameters around the child/children you are comfortable with joining your family, from gender, to race, to age, to number of kids, to level of medical, developmental, emotional, and physical needs. You also specify whether you want straight adoption, foster to adopt, foster, respite care, etc. You also go through a pretty long process in which a profile is compiled of your family (including pets!). When children enter the system, a case manager at the agency we are working with will send us as much information they have on the child(ren), usually including a brief bio about their personality, likes/dislikes, their level of needs, and why they were removed from the home. It also specifies if the parent has visitation, where in the legal process they are (to help us assess risk), and if they are evaluating relatives for placement, as relatives always will be the first choice if the parent is unable to prove competency. Lastly, they include a picture, which really brings the child(ren) to life. You then have to tell the case manager whether you want them to submit your profile to the CPS worker who is responsible for the child(ren), who will then use the profiles to determine where to place the child(ren).
So, back to today. We have only specified age (6 mos-6 yrs), and are only certified to accept a basic needs level, so this little girl would be a little older than we originally were comfortable with. We say we need a little time to think it over, and is there any way they can get more information on her background to help us make the decision. In the meantime, we are having every emotion you can go through - elation at the possibility of finally being parents, apprehension at stretching beyond our pre-set boundaries, concern that if we don't say yes we won't get more calls, anticipation over whether this little girl will like us. We didn't have long to process, though, because we soon get a response that they received additional information about the little girl, and that her needs level was a little more than we would be able to take on for our first placement. Back to waiting.
About an hour later, we received our second email, this time for a little boy, 3 years old, perfect; this time we immediately said yes with no hesitation. If we are chosen, this little boy would be part of our family by the weekend, which meant that we have 5 days to prepare. My type A self kicks in and immediately goes into "GSD" mode, so I email all of my Austin parent friends asking for their recommendations on pediatricians, preschools, nannies, and anything else we may need for a 3 year-old that we may not even know we needed. Saturday will be here before we know it, and I do not want to be scrambling to find everything when we should be bonding and paying attention to our child. Plus, I'm not going to lie, it helps to have something to focus your energy on when you are a bundle of nerves and anxiety. So, with my list of 'needs' in hand, I have something to occupy my time for the next few days...
